Some days are definitely meant to be spent in bed and I wish today had been one of them. What started out as a typical morning soon turned into drama, heartache, and a migraine. I can’t go into all the details because really, the details will make you wish you hadn’t even read this, so let’s just say that it was a day I hope to soon forgot. Some decisions were made today that made my makeup run down my face when I couldn’t hold back the tears any longer. Although all I really wanted to do was punch some holes in the wall. (Wow, I'm more like my dad than I thought. LOL) But truly, I feel like the whole world is against me when just yesterday I was feeling pretty good about things. Funny what a difference a few hours can make. I do not personally understand how I got to this point in my life and there’s not a day that goes by where I’m not digging through my memory for clues I must have missed. I'm really trying to learn to let go of the things I can't control but it's just not fair that others are making choices that affect my life. I know that the fact that I have a smart, kind, beautiful little girl as well as our health and a roof over our head should make me appreciative and happy but honestly, sometimes I just don't feel that way. So tonight I’ll go home, pick up my mini me, and hold her until she begs me to put her down and then I’ll enjoy the evening through her eyes because all is well in a 2 year olds world. When I awake tomorrow, hopefully the sun will bring me some peace and understanding. If not, I'll fake it until I make it because I really don't know what else to do.
Taken this past weekend before we went to a party..I just love that girl so much!
Life is like a bowl of cherries some days, you can eat them one by one and they are delicious, (your mom loves cherries) then you come across one that does not taste so good, but you eat it anyway, hating to throw anything away, but then you come across the rotten one and say, how in the world did this one get into my bag, tiff, eat the good ones and enjoy them, tolerate the not so good ones and for the rotten ones, throw them out, they happen, you have a lifetime ahead of you, there will be more rotten days, we all have them, you have so much to be grateful for, i see the pics of your mom and you and now caramia and long for yesterdays past, my heart aches because i wish i could make things better for you and i can't
ReplyDeletelove rick